Cancel poker night with the boys if you have it planned for the 14th. Unless you want your girl giving you the royal flush, you need to focus. Guys, you may have already noticed (or you may very well be completely oblivious) but Valentine’s Day is one of those days, like birthdays, when women can be hypersensitive. There’s something about days charged with a lot of romantic pressure that can sometimes crack a relationship. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve seen couples fighting on vacation. It can sometimes lead to breakups or at least turbulence and Valentine’s Day brings the same kind of danger. You have to tread lightly in order to keep everything copasetic. But that’s what I’m here for. If you follow this surefire guide, I guarantee you that not only will your relationship survive the love holiday, your brownie point count will go up, way up!
Sure, a lovey dovey card doesn’t do anything for your macho factor, but let me ask you this... how do you want this evening to end?
DO NOT DISAPPEAR
Today is not the day to ignore your cell phone or leave it off, show up an hour late or not at all. It doesn’t matter if you have a good excuse. There’s no such thing. It doesn’t matter if its not your fault. In her eyes, it is. On the other hand, there’s really no point in you showing up early either. Today of all days, she’ll be taking her sweet time to make sure she looks perfect (for you, by the way), so there’s not a penguin’s chance in hell that she’ll be ready early. Waiting around for her and getting on her case to hurry up is NOT the way you want to start off your romantic evening.
Number one... tell her she’s beautiful. Now let me just break down the difference between complementing HER and complementing SOMETHING ON HER. For instance, if you say "That dress looks great", you’re not saying she looks great, you’re talking about the dress. If you say "You did something with your hair", that’s not even a complement, and its not about her. It’s an observation about her hair. Focus on her. If you’re the sensitive type, you can come up with any number of creative ways to tell her how good she looks. If you’re not, the basics (beautiful, gorgeous, amazing...) are always winners. And you can say it more than once! Honestly, with some guys, I’d swear it actually physically pains them to say it. It doesn’t hurt, and it doesn’t cost anything. So do it, do it, and overdo it.
Secondly, avoid controversial topics on your day of romance, ESPECIALLY right before you go out. Be on your best behavior. Couples in love constantly fight about the same issues over and over. You’re probably very well acquainted with what buttons to push to make her mad, so don’t push them! Just don’t bring up those topics. Keep your conversation to safe topics only, like how hot she looks or how much you’re looking forward to spending the evening with her.
You don’t HAVE to get a gift, but you really, really should at least get her a card. And what it says inside is crucial. I know its tricky to find just the right card, that’s not too mushy on one end of the scale or too rude on the other. If you have to choose, go for the mushy one. Or better yet, choose a blank card and write something personal inside. Basically you should just tell her how you feel about her. Sure, a lovey dovey card doesn’t do anything for your macho factor, but let me ask you this... how do you want this evening to end? I’ll let you do the math.
A gift, although not necessary, is ALWAYS welcome. Try to come up with something thoughtful. I think the best idea is to make her something! If you can play an instrument or sing, write her a song. Even if you can’t sing, trust me, it does NOT matter. Every woman secretly fantasizes about a man writing a song about her or singing to her. Why do you think musicians have so much sex appeal? If you’re an artist, draw or paint her a picture. If you can build things, well go ahead and build her something. You’re getting the idea now, right? This cost-efficient gift idea is sure to win her over. It shows that you put thought, time and effort into showing her that you care. This beats a pricey hit to the credit card any day. If your girl doesn’t think so, I’m sorry to say it, but maybe you should reconsider why she’s with you in the first place.
Are you thinking "what’s in it for me?" Well here’s another idea. Buy her something she can wear for you that night. That way its win-win. She gets some new gear and you get to see her in it, and hopefully out of it! Just make sure its not TOO raunchy. Try to use a little taste. Even ask another girl what she thinks when you’re picking it out. If you go one step further and get another girl to try it on for you in the store, you probably want to leave that detail out when you give the gift.
Call WAY in advance to make reservations. Or, avoid the long waits, crowded dining rooms and hiked-up prices and cook for her! There’s something super-sexy about a man who’s slaved away in the kitchen for you. Also, you don’t have to worry about driving home after a bottle of wine. And dessert presents a variety of erotic possibilities (you can use your imagination on this one). Once you’ve prepared the meal, its all in the details. Guys, you may be baffled by them, but they are SO simple. Think of the five senses. Light some candles and put some flowers on the table. You can make the place smell amazing with a simmering brew on the stove (you need a pot, dump in some apple juice, cinnamon sticks and cloves and put it on the burner at the lowest setting). Don’t forget the music. Avoid that pressing temptation of turning on the TV to get your daily dose of sports. And don’t you DARE let her do the dishes! She’ll be putty in your hands. Just a tip... if you do choose to stay in, make sure she doesn’t think you’re going out. You might not know this, but there’s a difference between going out dressed up and staying in dressed up. You want to give her the information she needs to formulate her dressing strategy.
Follow these guidelines, and you will be sure to rank high in the love stakes. Even if your careful plans don’t turn out perfectly or go disastrously awry, as long as you’ve put the thought in, she’ll appreciate it. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to TRY to be perfect. Got it? Good luck and Happy Valentine’s Day!